Four Years Later…..and?

Wow! I cannot think of a better word to start this post.

I am not sure what made me visited WordPress today. I have not been on this site for the longest while. However, on looking back on my various posts, I realised that I uploaded my first one in September 2016. Can you imagine? Crikey the saying ‘Time waits for no man or woman’ is so true.

The most amazing but disappointing thing ever is that I am still fighting the good fat fight! I am actually heavier now than I was then. Four years! It has been four damn years! What the hell happened?

Well, life did. I went through a lot in the past four years and the one constant thing I, actually, believe I can control is food. I eat it for comfort when I am down. I eat to celebrate. I eat when I am bored and I eat when I am not. So, basically, I have a rather unhealthy attachment to food. Not even the veggie kind. Nope. Me? It is fried chicken, cake (lots of cake) and chocolate (even when I suffered with my lactose intolerance).

I am still in my forties, just about, and I would hate to review my posts in another four years and find myself saying the same flipping thing. Then, I might just roll and in a ball and stay.

Change is inevitable. To succeed in anything, one must adapt. However, when it comes to changing my mental link to food and health, I can honestly say, it is one change I am struggling to make.

Am I ready to make this change? You better believe I am? Sitting here on my sofa with my very expanded lock down backside, I am not happy. I don’t like that nothing fits. If I had to go anywhere right now, I would have to squeeze myself into the stretchiest pieces of clothing I own. I do not want to be that person!

So, here I am restarting my journey. Making a commitment to me; a promise; a contract to myself to be kind and loving to me. To put my health and wellbeing first. To look after myself both physically and mentally. To eat healthily and treat my body as the temple that it is.

Saturday 01 August 2020 marks the first day towards a healthier me.

Welp, that is it for now.

Aaaaaaaand Another Go!

Hello lovely people.  I know.  It has been forever and a day since I last posted anything.  In that time, I started kickboxing and on day one had the biggest belly flop ever and then hurt my foot.  I continued to mash up the foot some more in the gym.  I started looking like a blimp and generally just eating rubbish.

In that time, I have also stopped and restarted the gym.  Have another health kick.  Now I am hell bent on losing the blimp look.  So “she” says.

How sad is it that I am now attempting to cut sugar out of my diet for the umpteenth  time?  Seriously….why am I finding it so hard?  I seem to have the willpower for most everything else. Giving up sugar? Not so much.  Each time I attempt to give up sugar, this is me on day 3. Yup, you read that correctly……DAY 3!


I have threatened myself.  Slap myself around the head.  Give myself pep talks.  Tell myself off. I know I am sounding a tad cray cray for not only beating myself up but for having numerous conversations with myself……  But, you know what I discovered?  When it comes to sugar……


Okay, maybe not discovered, but you know what I mean.  Sugar is my Achilles Heel.  My best friend and my worst enemy.  The must have when that time of the month comes around.  My comfort……hum, maybe I should start listing the negatives and I may have chance, right? Woweeee.

Sugar is E.V.I.L.  Sugar is E.V.I.L.  Sugar is E.V.I.L.  NOPE!!  Not working! A million more times and probably it will sink.

I am back to the butt and gut competition.  When the blimp look appeared, everything grew! Oh man….literally everything grew. So, the competition is back in full force.  Which one will win?

Watch this space.

Happy almost British summer!

I am baaaaaack!

Guess what?  I have finally dragged my hiney back to the gym this week!


Okay, so that pic might be a bit too excited as I am now in pain and may be crying by the end of the week!  Pain or no, I am feeling great for restarting my exercise routine.  You no what? No matter how many time I find myself restarting exercise after a break, it still amazes me how quickly you can get out of shape!  Crikey, it is as hard as hell to get back to where I was a couple of months ago.  Time……time is definitely needed here.

I may get into an exercise rut in the future, who knows, but….today? Today I feel bloody good.  Oh and I need to get back on my healthy eating regime too.  This is taking a little more time to do, but I can honestly say that when I exercise I am more inclined to want to put healthier food in this bodaaaaay (she says after having a large Hot Chocolate)!  I am not exactly eating terribly this week and should still lose some pounds, but will get back on my diet regime from next Monday.  You know the one that sees me losing the weight?  Yup that one.  The only difference will be me making sure I have a more balanced approach so that I am not craving things I decide to drastically cut out. Thinking about my friend Sugar?  Don’t worry, I am too.

Well…… Since I took such a long break, me and target will have to move.  My last blog was optimistically holding out hope that I could still meet my target weight by the end of May.  Who was I fooling exactly?  Just little old me, myself and I!  I think I definitely need to give myself a solid 12 weeks to get this done.  Right?  Well, I am going to say “hell to the yes!”

So much for my itsy bitsy teeny weeny yellow polka dot bikini for the summer. Hmmmmm……. I am definitely not there yet.  I am still going to be strutting my stuff come summer though, just fully clothed!


Yup……that will be me when the coats have to be shown to the back of the wardrobe. Hah!  I do crack myself up……

It is back to business.  Yeah me!

Running on Empty

The past few weeks have seen me running totally on……


I took a short break from exercising because not only was I just feeling totally knackered, my asthma has been playing silly buggers with my breathing.  Now I am fighting myself to get back into the swing of things.  Cho man!! I feel like I am losing the fight too. Boohoo……

The problem? Not exercising means the weight is slowly creeping its way back on the bum and tum! ……and that competition was going so well too.  Now? Now I have to, not really start from scratch but, start again from where I currently am!  Can you imagine my mood?  Well you don’t have to……….

I am not entirely in a bad place with the weight gain, I am just not where I hoped I would be at this stage.  Don’t worry, next week I’ll add some sunshine.

One would think I would still be running on a high after the half-marathon.  Meh…… That run seems so far away now.  Not only that but, I have a 10K coming up on May 29th!  You might just find me in a corner rocking!  I am not prepared at all.  I really do not like the feeling of starting over.  CRAPOLA!!!

I am not sure why I am finding it so hard to get back into the swing of things with the gym.  I NEED the exercise.  I know this.  BUTTTT…… me getting up at 4 am has not been doing it for me at all.  Can someone come and roll me out of bed in the mornings for about a week?  That’s all I need to get back into workout mind frame.  Seriously! That. Is. All. I. Need!

Okay. Okay.  Sooooooo, I am going to pretend I am Rocky Balboa over the weekend.  That might work in getting me on the right mental track.  Oh, oh….maybe Million Dollar Baby? What do you think?


Yup.  I am laughing at myself too!

Seriously though, I find myself in a rut, a slump if you will and I am finding it harder to find a reason for this little phase.  This is definitely affecting my target!  I think I may need to move the goal post, sadly.

Maybe, I should see where I am in at the end of May, right?  Hmmmm.  Maybe.  Not giving up though.  I just need to push through this last bit. My inner 6-pack is still waiting to be discovered!

The mind and weightloss

So you know when ‘They’ say a six-pack is made in the kitchen and not the gym?  Not that I did not realise it before, but I have now totally accepted that weight loss is a full body and mind thing.  If your mind is not into it, you will not get very far!  Cho man…… Honestly, why can they not be on the same page at all times?  If only…… would be so much easier.

Okay, so I have done mostly well so far.  I say ‘mostly’ because I have had my fallen by the wayside moments, chocolate moments and binge moments since I started this journey in September 2016.  I cannot believe it has been more than 6 months!

March was a difficult diet month for me and definitely the hardest since I started this journey.  I also did less exercise than I have done in a really long time.  The problem?  I kind of lost my momentum!


True dat! So not cool.  The good thing is I have not totally lost it.  My mind though?  Is now so far out of the game that I think I might need to give myself a slap upside both sides of the head.

See my topic today?  Well, I am finding it hard to get out of my own head.  Dang it!  The mind is such a strong tool in succeeding in anything. I know I have a target I want to meet.  I know I have a target date.  But?  My mind cannot get out of the rest week I had to take due to shoulder and knee pain…I know (don’t say it)…..I am getting old.  Right now I am in a ‘just meh’ phase.    This is my mind at the moment……..


See?  My body is all ready for workout – me thinks – but my mind is still taking a break! MEH What to do? What to do?  The plan is to get my hiney back in the gym over the Easter break so that my week starts just right next week. NO EXCUSES!  I will be telling my mind to shut the hell up and get on with it!wp-1492073874996.

Well, I now have 6 weeks to my 10K run and my target date.  If these are not reasons enough to stop being an ostrich, I don’t know what will give me the extra push to finish the last mile.  Maybe I should start doing the Haka every morning before leaving for the gym.  What do you think?  Although I might need to get some lessons from the All Blacks first.

Anyways, have a wonderful Easter eating all the chocolate I am not allowed to eat! I got nothing but love for you. No…Really!


Running a Half-Marathon

Guess what? I ran a half-marathon. I know are you dying to say ‘no you didn’t’ just to hear me say ‘oh yes I did.’ Okay, enough of me being silly and cracking up on my own when no one but me finds this funny (a comedian I am not).

So just over a week ago, I ran the Adidas Silverstone Half-Marathon (13.1 miles / 21.08241 to be exact).  It took me a whopping 2 hrs 32 mins 09 secs to complete.  Daaaang!  Do you know what it is like to keep running for two and a half hours!  Long distance running can be a rather lonely activity. But, I had some great music to listen to and of course the fantastic atmosphere you tend to find at organised runs.  There were some interesting things to see too.  This was my absolute favourite t-shirt quote ever…….

Had to do a double-take, didn’t you? 

There were some incredible people running, in groups or on their own and for various charities.  There were some annoying ones too!  So, listen to this….  I was waiting in line for the loo before tackling this long run and there were these 2 girls in front of me all decked out (matchy and matchy and stuff).  They were doing the most over-the-top stretches I have ever seen.  I then heard this lady behind me snorted and said, ‘yeah we know you are fit!’  I totally cracked up.  The people brought a certain lightness to the whole thing.

I did not manage to take too many photos (oh, but I wanted to…I was after all on a F1 track).  Needless to say that I solely focused on putting one leg in front of the other to get to the finish line.  I only managed a few at the start.

wp-1490352809209.jpg I would have found it totally hard to run in any contraption. Impressive, right?


There was also a lady dressed as a tree, but so help me God, I could not have stopped and taken a photo even if I wanted to.  My legs were in motion and I knew that if I stopped, starting again would have been a challenge. So I Forrest Gumped it and just kept running. Hah…me being funny again.

At the beginning of the run, there was this runner that I kind of wanted to literally shake!! Picture this……man in high vis vest (bright yellow) and long hair (not held in a man bun…what was he thinking?).  So, all I could see in my peripheral vision was a blur of yellow speeding pass only for him to start walking after about 50m.  As soon as I caught up with him, there he went again. I know he was not competing with me at all, but I kind of wanted to shake him and say…Hey! Run or Walk!!! Cho!  He was sooooooo distracting.   I finally managed to leave him behind at about the 3-mile mark.

Even though the morning was colder than I thought (just look at the grey skies in the pics), there I was in a t-shirt and my charity running vest. Madness, I know!  It did not take long for me to start getting way too hot.


During the run, I drank too much water and waaaaaay too much lucozade!  There were also kids and little old ladies along the route handing out haribo. Of course, I had to eat me some heart haribo.  The sugar was definitely needed (I have no willpower when it comes to sugar…hopeless).

There were so many people taking part.  I find it amazing that so many people would travel so far to take part in the run.  Then again, I was there too so who I am to say anything.  I did join the madness.

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Here are a couple pics of me.  I am in my stride and then holding up my medals (massive grin here).  Yeah me!

810488_1134_0046 I started to pass people at this stage. Such a boost!


It looks like I am running by myself here!  I promise, there were people, beside…behind…and in front of me! The photographer just zoomed in on me.  What was he/she thinking?







810504_1018_0018WHOO HOO!  Just picture the mental hand raising here…oh and the big grin!

My next challenge is the London 10K on May 29.  After 13.1 miles, I can definitely run 6 miles.


Still Here……Still in the Game

Have I lost my steam?  Not really.   I just had very little to add for the past couple of weeks and I kind of did not want to regurgitate the same ole, same ole.  You know what I am talking about…….

I lose weight.  I gain weight.  I lose weight.  I gain weight.  I exercise a lot.  I eat healthily.  I exercise a lot.  I eat healthily.  I binge on sugary foods………Blah….


The cycle continues people and it is a cycle I am trying my hardest to break so that I can build life long healthy habits.  It is not easy, I tell you.  It has taken years for me to indulge in the unhealthy world, so I am beginning to finally understand that it will take some time to not want to eat what is considered unhealthy (they are unhealthy….really, my mind just need to accept this).


So, this is just to let you know that I am still here.  I am still committed to reaching my target by end of May (10K on May 29th – final target date).  My butt and tummy are still in the battle of the reducing bulge (butt is totally in the lead).  I am still working hard in the gym and I have been taking on some running challenges (a blog to follow about my half marathon and runs).  In not so many words…  My final goal is still firmly in my sights.


This is a short one……  Have a fantastic week meh peeps.


Where I am

Crikey, I cannot believe that it is already 5 months since my first blog!  Can you believe it?  I am still pinching myself.  It has definitely not been the easiest journey.  I have had my binge days, my chocolate days and my ‘I can’t be asked’ days.  I have had big weight losses and just as big weight gains.  Trust me when I say, it has been a roller coaster ride. I know I still have a way to go yet, but I am taking a ‘pat on the back’ moment right now (I did actually pat myself of the back too).


Five months may seem like a short time frame, but I have achieved quite a bit so far on this journey of mine. I reached my first milestone and lost more than 2 stones/12.7 kg/28 lbs.  I am fitter than I have been in way too long to remember and I am now wearing medium sized clothes comfortably (massive smile here – teeth skinning grin to be honest).

I have also started a few personal development thingies due to feeling generally better.  I will be running a half marathon in a couple of weeks (madness I tell you) for Children with Cancer UK; I have finally started to learn how to swim (I am still absolutely shite at it…..but hey ho, it will get better with time) and I now volunteer for a couple of charities.  Great news? With the weight loss and fitness level increasing, I am way more……


Damn it though….as much as I am celebrating at the moment, the journey continues.  I have to get back to being focused and get on with the business of losing weight and getting fit.  The last couple of weeks has been a great example of my highs and lows. Two weeks ago, I was super strict with my diet and had a really big loss.  This week?  Well, this week I just ate and gained back most of the weight lost the week before.  Just so you know, I had my hair braided with chunky plaits, so I am totally blaming some of the weight gain to the hair (I know……it is a reach)! Can you see my struggle here?  Oh the pain.

Anyways, my target date is looming.  When you think about it, May is not that far and I am more than determined to reach my target by the deadline I set.  So, I am going to, AGAIN, attempt to give up sugar (and  not replace it with sweetener even if the sweetener boast of being calorie free).  I will still chow down on my fruits though and will only be giving up processed sugar. Lent is a good time to give this a go even if I started a couple of days late (oooooops).  Then…..I am going to keep…….


Thank you for the support so far.  I cannot tell you how much this means to me but I can try. IT MEANS A HELL OF A LOT!! 


Two Stone Mark

As Chris (evil trainer) would say….BOOOOOM!! 👊I have reached the 2-stone weight loss mark. Massive pat on the back here.  I am so incredibly pleased to have reached my first milestone.  Two (2) Stones…… That’s 28 lbs (12.7 kg) of fat off my body.  You may never understand how I feel, but I have to say that I feel flipping fantastic.  Yeah me!

Progress so far

Starting Weight:  14 st 2.5 lbs (198.5 lbs / 90 kg)

Current Weight:  12 st (168 lbs / 76.2 kg)

Weight loss to date:  2 st 3 lbs (31 lbs / 14.1 kg)

Just think….I have lost the blob below x28!


My next interim weight target is 11 st 7 lbs (161 lbs / 73 kg).  This just basically means I have to keep doing what I am doing now, even if a bit of wrench was thrown in the mix today at my hospital appointment.  I have been given 3 months of steroid tablets to take before my long term treatment starts in May.  “What is the challenge?” you asked.  I tend to put weight on when on these steroid tablets (good old prednisolone).  I am going to have to be so dang strict with myself in the coming months. I am really not sure how to feel about that yet.  Usually, I allow myself to relax on my food on weekends or when I go out eating with friends.  How do I still lose weight while taking these tablets?  There is always a way.

I will still be working hard to build muscle mass while losing weight too 💪.  This is another thing.  Muscles weigh far more than fat, even if muscles looks smaller in size.  Did you know you can basically find an image of anything on the internet?  Of course you did………


Look at the difference in size!  Great thing about muscles on your body though?  You just look waaaaaaay better.  Full stop…..period……yada yada….  You know what I mean.

You know what? I can’t wait to wear all that clothes in my wardrobe I had refused to throw out in hopes of fitting in them one day.  Well, one day will be soon!  Lots of strutting my stuff to come.

On to my next target!!  Will keep you posted.

Food Dream or Nigtmare

Dear God… Today, help me to be a good girl and not eat any chocolate or cheese or sweets or just about any food that will not help me on my journey.  You would never guess what? Over the weekend, I had a dream that my meal was nothing but fried batter.  Just FRIED BATTER!!  In my dream I was there searching for syrup or honey to cover the dang things. Seriously, if I am going to dream about food why could it not have been about cake or deep fried chicken or better yet a big tub of ice cream (even if I am not meant to eat any diary products).  Nope, my dream was about fried batter.  What a saddo…….

Just imagine there are no mushrooms covered here

Anyway, I declare that this week is going to be a great food week.  I had soft boil eggs with a slice of toast this morning for breakfast and I am planning to have a fruit lunch day.  My lamb chops are already marinating in the fridge at home for dinner tonight.

I will also be keeping on top of my exercise.  Although, I think I might have aggravated an old shoulder injury.  I could barely lift my arm on Sunday.  I am still in a bit of pain today, so no gym this morning.  I needed to rest the shoulder for my swimming lessons later tonight.  I seriously need to get a physio session in though.  I can’t be slacking on the exercise.wp-1487582588515.png

It has been a while since l last update you on the tums/butt competition.  To be honest, I think the butt is in the lead.  I still have a one pack!  I have faith that the 6 pack is just taking cover for the moment and will emerge any day now.  Right?  The lower abs?  Crikey, it is just round…… and the battle goes on.  Honestly?


Here is to a great week.  I STILL GOT THIS! I STILL GOT THIS! I STILL GOT THIS! Do you think if I tell myself this often enough, I will believe?  Yes.  I still got this.